My short term memory is deteriorating. At first it was just momentary lapses,  the M.E brain fog.  Other times it was natural born dizziness. 

It’s getting worse.

I forget to turn the oven off.

I forget to turn the tumble drier on.

Even when constantly repeating something over and over in my mind, such as  the next thing I want to do/read/google/say, it still evades my memory.  I feel stupid and distressed.

I scrunch my eyes up tight hissing at everyone to shut up whilst I try so hard to remember.  My teeth grit in concentration.

It’s like it’s been literally removed from my mind.

Yet it leaves a hole.

So I know something was there.

I just can’t remember what the something was.

I used to have an awesome memory.

I’m also finding it incredibly difficult to concentrate. I have to exert all my attention to concentrate on even small things.

I used to be a total multitasker.

Maybe it’s the meds.

I just don’t know.


3 thoughts on “

  1. That’s the frustrating thing about serious memory problems (mine is part of Dyspraxia/ADD), sometimes they leave a hole as you say, so you remember that you’ve forgotten something. Not just annoying but literally life altering! I hate that feeling of trying hold on tight to a thought that’s rapidly slipping away – in the same when that the more you try to remember a dream the more illusive it gets. It’s starting to affective the relationship with my old friends now as they are having kids and there kids are having milestones like walking and I can barley remember their kids or husbands names or forgetting them many times in the space of an hour so it looks like I don’t care or I’m too self-involved. How do your memory and concentration problems effect your relationships?

  2. It might be the meds but IMO it’s just as likely to be linked to lack of sleep. You’ve been co sleeping nurslings for years and years without breaks (well, only for pregnancy, and we all know how easy it is to sleep when you’re the size of a whale!). FWIW my memory is also turning to goo these days but I put it down to being so busy and multi tasking at work.

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